I try to find some quiet time for myself... it's usually early in the morning when John is still sleeping. I check my email, update his website, have a cup of coffee and just try to de-stress a bit. I just started having my friends over once a month after work for a couple of hours to scrapbook.
Since I work full time, going out after work is hard. I feel like I need to be home to make dinner and get John anything he needs. But, I do go for very early morning coffee breaks with my friends at least every couple of weeks.
It's hard to keep up with everything- work, the house, taking care of John and raising the boys- but I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here. Each day is a gift and I'm trying to live in the moment.
One of my friends, who lost her husband a year ago, totally changed her schedule. She said the nights were the hardest time, so she would come home from teaching, eat dinner and go to bed at 7 pm. She said it was easier to be alone in the morning than at night.... she's gradually getting back into a more normal routine, but she said it really helped in the early months.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.